One 

    Two 

    One, two, three, four 

    G  
    Five learned scholars 

         C           G
    were each paid a dollar 

                         E7                 A7   D7
    to see if they could find out something new 

             G  
    but they met with some resistance 

          C              A7 
    for accordin' to the distance
 
         G                  D7/A    D7      G  
    they noticed things got smaller or they grew 


    G           
    A ship far out at sea 

              C             G
    looked no bigger than a flea 

               E7              A7    D7
    relatively speaking of its size 

            G
    so they thought it more effective 

        C            A7
    to eliminate perspective 

       G               D7/A   D7          G
    as all they had to do was close their eyes 

        
    G       
    Having thus removed illusion 

              C              G
    they were thrown into confusion 
                                E7               A7      D7

    for they found the darkness painful to their shins

         G   
    so it met with their approval 

       C           A7 
    to order the removal 

       G               D7/A D7      G 
    of everything from elephants to pins




    (Instr:  G  C  G  E7  A7  D7  

             G  G7  C  A7  G  D7/A  D7  G)


    G         
    A passion in them burned 

         C              G
    they left no worm unturned  
 
                           E7
    they flattened all the bumps to fill in 

    A7     D7
    holes

             G
    and from Leicester to East Anglia 

         C             A7 
    made continents rectangular 

        G         D7/A D7      G 
    and evenly distributed the poles


    G
    But still it was no use 

               C              G 
    from their sponsors came abuse 

                           E7          A7    D7 
    along with threats of "not a penny more!" 

       G  
    so in exasperation 

            C             A7
    they proclaimed imagination

        G              D7/A     D7        G
    the novelty they'd all been searching for 




    (Instr:  G  C  G  E7  A7  D7 
 
             G  G7  C  A7  G  D7/A  D7  G)


    G 
    The five of them sat drinkin' 

         C                  G
    all alone amongst their thinkin' 

                      E7                    A7   D7
    but of the gab sadly each still had the gift 

        G
    and so with each uncorkin' 

        C                A7
    the wine did all the talkin' 

        G                D7/A        D7       
    and as each one held forth, each one came 

    G       
    fifth 


    G           
    And long into the night 

         C                G
    they argued wrong and right 

                             E7   
    'til death itself called out "last orders 

    A7        D7
    please," 

           G
    so the five learned scholars 

           C             A7
    sang a song for five dollars 

        G               D7/A      D7      G  
    and left this life upon their hands and 
    
    knees. 


           (Instr:  G  C  G  E7  A7  D7 


                    G  G7  C  A7  G  D7/A  D7  G)


                   (G  D7  G  D7 G  D7  G)







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